


Cadence Fail

by jalendavi_lady



Series: Winry And Roy series from fma_fic_contest [4]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: Canon - First Anime, Community: fma_fic_contest, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-10-28
Updated: 2009-10-28
Packaged: 2017-10-13 05:23:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/133439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jalendavi_lady/pseuds/jalendavi_lady
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mustang can't stand the noise in his office. Set after <i>Conqueror Of Shamballa</i>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cadence Fail

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the Drill (251-500 words) prompt at [](http://www.livejournal.com/users/fma_fic_contest/profile)[**fma_fic_contest**](http://www.livejournal.com/users/fma_fic_contest/) .

Not for the first time this year--hell, if he was going to be honest about it, it was already the sixth time this month--Brigadier General Roy Mustang wished his office was not within earshot of the parade ground.

 _I'm still lucky they let me back into the State Alchemist program at my former rank._

It wasn't even the noise of the marching on the parade ground that drove him up the wall.

Hawkeye had joked, more than once, that it was the reminder of the ideal military discipline that the pile of paperwork on his desk did not reflect.

It was always pained joking, and he suspected she had the same problem.

(She was always better at hiding some things than he was. Whenever he reminded her of this, she countered that he was better at hiding everything else.)

It was those damn cadences.

Particularly the ones used with the newest recruits, who often hadn't--and it made him feel older than hell to think of it--even been born when the Ishbal War had started. Which, unfortunately, meant those were the cadences everyone knew and was familiar with.

The cadence in question this afternoon involved a small-town village tart and a particularly impressive prize winning vegetable of an _extremely_ suggestive nature.

Everything was calm and peaceful except for the cadence.

Hawkeye was coming to the office in a few minutes to run over some figures with him.

It was a convenient excuse to surrender and give up getting anything done until her arrival.

He wished he could stop the way over half the cadences in the mostly male military talked about the women back home they were _supposed_ to be defending--even after the issues that had caused in Ishbal.

At least all his joking about miniskirt uniforms had been directed at other _officers_ , never civilian or enlisted women. And at least one of those officers knew fully that he'd only ever said it to blend in with the culture that had generated those cadences.

Hawkeye knocked and entered. Mustang could tell her day was going just as badly.

They were halfway through the figures when the cadence abruptly ended mid-sentence, followed by screaming and apparent running.

Hawkeye glanced nonchalantly at the window, then returned to the sheets of statistics.

"Hawkeye?" he asked.

"That was the 'Ollie The Tart Of Northern Region' cadence, sir."

"And?"

She smiled, faintly. "Major General Armstrong is here making her report on the status of the northern border."

He stared at her, dumbfounded, for a full thirty seconds before they both broke down laughing.

"They... they serenaded Olivia Armstrong with 'Ollie the Tart'?" He barely got the words out. "Olivia?"

Hawkeye nodded.

A woman with a sword charged through the hall. "Did any of them come through here?"

Mustang managed to say, "No sir, Major General sir."

From that day forward, Mustang and Hawkeye never had to listen to explicit cadences from the parade ground.

Everyone was too scared to use them.


End file.
